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Moments

Posted on November 9, 2019November 9, 2019 by Rosie Lewis

Waiting…

Strapped down tight, goggles ready

Heart in mouth

We edge closer to the gaping doorway

The wind noise rushes and hits me in the face

I’m surrounded by white noise

And then

I’m out

F

A

L

L

I

N

G

One mile in seconds

Complete oblivion and euphoria

Time stands still

I watch the Earth

The ground rising up to meet me

Around me is serenity

Falling through white clouds that touch your face like angel graces

So much blue – the sky like cool water

Then the ‘chute engages

And you’re jerked up and back with a jolt

That’s when the contractions hit you, you know

No longer are you waiting

That baby is coming and wants to come fast

Your body isn’t your own

Stomach churning like a natural machine

PAIN – everywhere

But purpose so much purpose

‘I WANT TO PUSH’

  • Fade in and out    –

Now I’m in the desert

Hot sun searing over my head

Beading back up in the reflections from the sand

White soft hills stretch out to the infinity

One step after the other

Fit my feet into the shadow of the guide

I’m lost

Lost in awe and wonder and contemplation

I say prayers that have sat beneath my soul a thousand years

Mother Mary holds my hand

The skies move above me

Yet I stand still

Take it in – Breathe

I’m breathing hard, can’t contain or control the pain

It’s consuming me

I scramble to hold on, to find some way to make it stop or cease or pause

…

PUSH – PUSHING HARD

Screaming in effort

Screaming in frustration and rage and instinct

Bloody knees up to my chest

Feel the stretch and the tear

Baby’s crowning – take a breath

Not. Done. Yet.

I hover 200 feet in the air, held only by a strap and a stranger’s hand

I lean back, cross my arms, think a prayer

NO

I don’t want to drop

I don’t want to go

I’m not ready!

Baby comes when she is ready

Not your choice anymore, sweetheart

Leave those childish games aside

…

Living doll in your arms

Just you and her

You’ve all the time in the World –

Time to grow up together.

Posted in Poetry from the journey, recent postsTagged birth

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  • Home
    • About Us – Meet the Flock
  • Recent Posts
  • Gospel reflections
  • Wisdom in the Wilderness
  • Bible Studies
  • Blessed are the Losers
  • Catechism Pearls
  • Poetry from the journey
  • Book reviews
  • Small group resources
  • Mass Encounter Sheets
  • The odd blog
  • Podcasts