
Are you hungry yet? I mean really hungry, not just peckish or in need of something to tide you over, but starving?
What if I’m not asking about your lenten fast, what if I’m asking, are you this hungry for Jesus yet? Not just at the stage where Mass would be nice, but at a place where your lack of the Eucharist is becoming all consuming, something you need to find a distraction from to ease that ache in the pit of your stomach? If I search my heart I’m not there yet but I want to be.
This has been a stark awakening that I have become a consumer of Jesus, I’ve been so well fed with Daily Mass and the sacraments for the last few years that it has become as familiar as the air that I breathe, expected, necessary and with that, perhaps common place. I’ve been drifting into forgetting that I don’t have a right to receive Him in this way, I have done nothing that earns me a seat at His Table. It is a pure privilege to be invited.
I am starting to see the biggest gift from this Eucharistic fast. It’s the first pangs of hunger. Hunger that I have not had for a long time, and it’s a delicious pain, a deep groan that has yet to become audible. I’m feeding on the Word, almost hourly but that is merely intensifying my appetite for the heavenly Manna that I’m having to wait for.
He won’t leave us here for long friends, but just long enough. Maybe just long enough to be hungry and humble, to be eager for the scraps that fall from the table. How much more does that prepare our hearts, when what we are actually given is a banquet. How much more appropriately clothed we will be wrapped in thirst, humility and gratitude.
Lean in to the hunger, let your desire for receiving Him distract you from all else, and anticipate, dream of the day He is once again crowning your lips with His body and Blood. My God is surely worth the wait.